The internet is getting so good and I think that mostly because people I know are beginning to be all over it. May I direct your attention to Today My Boss. Newly added to the blog roll, it’s a hilariously written piece of resistance penned by a compatriot of mine who’s identity will remain safely anonymous. You know. So her stupid fucking boss doesn’t fire her.

I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention to this (I know I haven’t because I’ve been on spring break for the past 10 days during which I tried my best not to give much of a fuck about anything) but apparently Attorney General Alberto Gonzales got himself into a little bit of trouble. It seems as though he fired 8 US attorneys for no reason except for that he didn’t like their faces so that Bush could replace them with Republican operatives without Senate confirmation using a provision of the PATRIOT Act. What a patriot indeed! Now it seems like the patriotic thing for Gonzales to do is resign because everybody is pissed. Since he’s not doing though - he has, after all, a wide base of support - it gives Senate Democrats a chance to smack what’s left of the Bush administration around a little bit.

Yesterday, understanding which way the wind is blowing, the White House offered up Rove and Miers for the usual friendly testimony, free from the hassle of having to place either testifier under oath. While that was certainly thoughtful of the office of the White House Counsel, Patrick Leahy politely told them to go fuck themselves and Congress is getting ready to issue subpoenas to those same couple of folks. The Washington Post is billing this as a “constitutional showdown” which is, you know, kind of an overstatement. We prefer to think of it as something else.

The United States Postal Service probably spent money in order to mark the 30th anniversary of Star Wars. You can find out what the deal is with it here and see more pictures here.

When a woman in her 70s died onboard a flight for a BA flight to Delhi, the crew scooped her up and moved her to first class, where there was more room. However, they had no unoccupied row and placed her next to passenger Paul Trinder, who found the whole experience “deeply disturbing.” The dead lady was accompanied by her grieving daughter. When he complained after the flight, he says BA told him to “get over it.” From the Times Online via Boing Boing.

Last night, a health program hosted by Tom Brokaw being broadcast in Phoenix, Ar. was replaced by hardcore porn, upsetting all the old people who were watching it. The network, an NBC affiliate I guess, said that it was “an act of human sabotage.” We see it more as an intervention of good taste.

Hola, Warriors. Here at Culture Warrior HQ [read: THE LIBRARY], we want you to get the most fair-’n'-balanced news commentary. That’s why, EVEN THOUGH we’re all rabid leftists, we decided to give you a little run-down on armies Everywhere and what they’ve been doing with themselves [US military not included….].

-”We’ve spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it’s not a problem”
Apparently some Swiss soldiers accidentally crossed the unmarked border into the tiny, TINY country that is most well-known for… anyone? anyone? Manufacturing computer chips, right [this is what CIA WorldFactbook told us]?
“Liechtenstein, which has about 34,000 inhabitants and is slightly smaller than Washington DC, doesn’t have an army.” [Mia Steinle, contributing Culture Warrior, would like to remind everyone that Washington, DC ALSO does not have an army.]
[Swiss Accidentally Invade Lichtenstein-NYT]

-What does the world’s largest democracy do with its cream-of-the-crop soldiers? PROTECT ITS PRECIOUS CRICKET TEAM, THAT’S WHAT. Clearly we do not take our sports players seriously enough in this fair country. And you know what? As long as India also deploys commandos to protect my beloved Bollywood Superstar SRK, I’m ok with that.
[Commandos to protect Indian team-BBC]

-Australian soldiers deal E IN UNIFORM. Do you think they also put the hazards on in their landrover so they can have flashing lights!? Can they get pacifiers ‘n’ glo sticks at the Commisary!??
[Army duo accused of drug deals-SMH]

This Gawker piece/mockery of the Bourgeois Goodman […did I say Bourgeois?!? I meant BERGDORF. BERGDORF… MY BAD!!11!! SRY!] Website’s book selection piqued my interest enough to explore, dare I say, COVET the book selection. [$750 Heirloom Bible? King James Version? SOLD!] Then?!? Then I clicked “CDs” and found this:

It’s a compilation of Chanel frontman/superdiva Karl Lagerfeld’s favorite tunes… and it’s pretty good!!

Karl Lagerfeld listens to Stereolab when he’s “at work”?? I LISTEN TO STEREOLAB WHEN I’M “AT WORK”!! This man and his size 28 ass was CLEARLY meant to be my BFF, Forever, 4 Lyfe! Let’s face it folks, Karl Lagerfeld- the man, the waif, the Icon- has great taste in music!

-[Karl Lagerfeld Les Musiques Que J’aime- Bergdorf Goodman]