Drool Fest 2007! Ten military bloggers got a special briefing from the President after his prime-time speech Iraq last week.

In this meeting, Ward Carroll of Military.com said the president seemed more comfortable with his message than on TV. We’re led to believe Bush’s becomes articulate when surrounded by hand-picked pro-Bush and pro-war supporters probably because he can say “Scrabble-ma-jangles” without judgment.

Carrol described the President’s performance in front of the blogger round-table:

“No deer-in-the-headlights stuff here. Truly unwavering and passionate.”

Apparently, the standard for unwavering presidential passion has been boiled down to looking less like a fawn frozen before its slaughter than one usual does.

Facts on the ground notwithstanding, he believes the United States can win the Iraq War. And to be honest, being around him made me believe it at that moment too.”

I would hate for facts to withstand the thrall of the President’s most recent victory pep rally among the loyal.

Source: President Reaches Out to a Friendly Circle in New Media [WaPo]

Condi wears the pants in every relationship.

We’re lagging a little behind on this, but Forbes released their review of The World’s 100 Most Powerful Women late last month. It seems the times really are a-changin’ as most of the American women are getting bumped down the list against their international counterparts. A quick rundown:

Ol’ Condoleezza, once THE most powerful woman in the world, lost her 2006 second-place standing to place fourth. Maybe this is a good thing. And the media maven herself, Oprah, dropped completely off the Top 20 – a major turnaround from her ninth place ribbon in 2005 – to finish at 21. But even though she doesn’t start wars or command armies, Oprah still knows how to get things done better than some of our more prominent policymakers *cough, cough* like Hillary and Nancy Pelosi, numbers 25 and 26, respectively.

Our vote for this year’s biggest loser? Let’s just say she was dumb enough to marry the current president. She was the fourth most powerful woman in 2004 but has since been lost in obscurity to finish at number 60 this year. Hell Laura, even Meredith Vieira (#55) beat you.

Best in show went to Angela Merkel (#1), Chancellor of Germany, for the second year in a row, followed by Wu Yi (#2), Vice premier of China. An honorable mention went to Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf (#100), president of Liberia. We had no idea either.

Featured Song: “Sweet Talkin Woman” by Electric Light Orchestra


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Source:
Special Report: The 100 Most Powerful Women Forbes.com

In a pretty useless move, McRove has announced his departure from the White House as of August 31.

Don’t get us wrong; it’s great news. But the outgoing deputy chief of staff left only after he was essentially acquitted of any wrongdoing in the Valerie Plame case and unscathed after the firing of attorney generals, not to mention he’s leaving the mess that is George Bush behind him. Nonetheless, the evil mastermind believes that all will be well with the Bush league:

“Look, he’s a very competitive guy. None of us is indispensable or unreplaceable except (Bush) and Dick Cheney, and they ain’t going anywhere.”

Apparently, no one taught the man-devil to clean up after himself. Or proper grammar.

Featured Song: “Evil (Is Going On)” by Howlin’ Wolf

From the Wa Po Via Fresh Intelligence: It has been hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock here in our nation’s capital for the past couple of weeks and the White House is cracking down on the amount of crack their interns are aloud to show.

The e-mail reminder was all in capital letters. It advised that there would be no jeans, sneakers, shorts, miniskirts, T-shirts, tank tops and — with boldface added — “NO FLIP FLOPS.” (Which, of course, is good advice, if rarely followed in this town.)

I mean, can’t argue with that. Then there’s this unsourced quote:

“When the Clintons came in, all hell broke loose” in terms of dress code — and perhaps other things? — one current aide said. “We’re just trying to get things back on track.”

For fucks sake. Douchebag, you guys have been in there for almost seven years. We know you’re a bunch of repressed pseudo-puritanical nutcases or whatever, but really, what does Bill Clinton have to do with the way your 18 - 25 year-old staffers dress in the summertime. Honestly. And they wonder why Iraq is such a fucking disaster.

Featured Song: “Nothings Going To Change My Clothes” by They Might Be Giants

Bush took some questions on Iraq today. But only one questions really got our attention:

Mr. President, you started this war; it’s a war of your choosing, and you can end it. Alone. Today, at this point, bring in peacekeepers, U.N. peacekeepers. Two million Iraqis have fled the country as refugees. Two million more are displaced. Thousands and thousands are dead. Don’t you understand? You have brought the Al Qaeda into Iraq.

Helen Thomas, you’re our Culture Warrior.

Source: Bush on Iraq and Congress [CNN (Video)]

In the GOP’s latest effort to scramble the party platform away from public opinion of Bush, the Washington Post is reporting that Bush made the decision to commute I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby’s 30-month prison sentence almost single-handedly. Lone Ranger Bush didn’t even discuss his decision with the Justice Department or even his Republican buddies, who largely wanted a full pardon for Cheney’s chief of staff.

The “Free Scooter” camp is still outraged though. I mean, a commutation is like getting stuck on third base. Why not a fucking home run? One former senator Republican Alan Simpson was quoted asking:

“Why should anyone worry about that? [Bush] gets hammered every day. They don’t think George is doing anything right, so what do you lose?”

Yeah, man. I mean, George is already fucking up, so just let him fuck EVERYTHING up. Basically, the American legal system is to Bush what a room in the Beverly Hill Hotel is to Keith Moon. Still, the most disgusting part (and there are many) of this whole ordeal is the conservative fan base that Bush has regained. The Weekly Standard’s William Kristol said:

“By acting here, he is showing to conservatives the kind of leadership that made conservatives loyal to Bush once and could make them loyal once more,” Kristol said.

Good old Texas conservative leadership, folks: keep your buddies close and fry everyone else. But don’t be too hard on Bush; he’s trying really, really hard to pretend to know what justice really is. After all, just because Scoot is getting out of jail, that doesn’t mean that the judge, jury, prosecutor, defense, media and the rest of America wasted it’s time and money:

“The reputation he gained through his years of public service and professional work in the legal community is forever damaged,” Bush said.

The poor man’s gone through so much already. He’s probably never going to get a job again. Hmm. He’s going to be blacklisted from Washington. No…well, it’s going to really, really suck. Seriously.

Source: Bush Wipes Away Libby’s Prison Sentence [Washington Post]
Source: A Decision Made Largely Alone [Washington Post]