It seems as if Bill O’Reilly isn’t the only one suffering from foot-in-mouth syndrome. Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff tried to pawn of the construction of 670-mile-long fence along the U.S.-Mexico border as an environmental issue.

Turns out, though, that the fence can actually hurt the environment worse, cutting animals off from water and spoiling the view. But Chertoff is trying to convince critics that most of these environmental concerns have been and can be further addressed. Not only that, but the fence actually helps the enviroment:

Illegal migrants really degrade the environment. I’ve seen pictures of human waste, garbage, discarded bottles and other human artifact in pristine areas. And believe me, that is the worst thing you can do to the environment.

Featured Song: “Sittin’ On A Fence” by The Rolling Stones


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Source
Chertoff Defends Border Fence AP

Drool Fest 2007! Ten military bloggers got a special briefing from the President after his prime-time speech Iraq last week.

In this meeting, Ward Carroll of Military.com said the president seemed more comfortable with his message than on TV. We’re led to believe Bush’s becomes articulate when surrounded by hand-picked pro-Bush and pro-war supporters probably because he can say “Scrabble-ma-jangles” without judgment.

Carrol described the President’s performance in front of the blogger round-table:

“No deer-in-the-headlights stuff here. Truly unwavering and passionate.”

Apparently, the standard for unwavering presidential passion has been boiled down to looking less like a fawn frozen before its slaughter than one usual does.

Facts on the ground notwithstanding, he believes the United States can win the Iraq War. And to be honest, being around him made me believe it at that moment too.”

I would hate for facts to withstand the thrall of the President’s most recent victory pep rally among the loyal.

Source: President Reaches Out to a Friendly Circle in New Media [WaPo]

Condi wears the pants in every relationship.

We’re lagging a little behind on this, but Forbes released their review of The World’s 100 Most Powerful Women late last month. It seems the times really are a-changin’ as most of the American women are getting bumped down the list against their international counterparts. A quick rundown:

Ol’ Condoleezza, once THE most powerful woman in the world, lost her 2006 second-place standing to place fourth. Maybe this is a good thing. And the media maven herself, Oprah, dropped completely off the Top 20 – a major turnaround from her ninth place ribbon in 2005 – to finish at 21. But even though she doesn’t start wars or command armies, Oprah still knows how to get things done better than some of our more prominent policymakers *cough, cough* like Hillary and Nancy Pelosi, numbers 25 and 26, respectively.

Our vote for this year’s biggest loser? Let’s just say she was dumb enough to marry the current president. She was the fourth most powerful woman in 2004 but has since been lost in obscurity to finish at number 60 this year. Hell Laura, even Meredith Vieira (#55) beat you.

Best in show went to Angela Merkel (#1), Chancellor of Germany, for the second year in a row, followed by Wu Yi (#2), Vice premier of China. An honorable mention went to Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf (#100), president of Liberia. We had no idea either.

Featured Song: “Sweet Talkin Woman” by Electric Light Orchestra


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Source:
Special Report: The 100 Most Powerful Women Forbes.com

Their love will go on.

It looks like the honeymoon is over for U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, according to the New York Times.

Awesomely enough, this news comes only two weeks after our pal Rove resigned, making August the best month ever. Gonzales followed Bush from Texas after serving as his personal attorney, but years of hard work paid off when John Ashcroft announced his resignation in 2004. The first Hispanic attorney general, Fredo was the token Hispanic climed the political ladder only to horribly fall from Republican grace when he seemed to be stuck in a permanent haze whenever he was asked any question actually relevant to his job.

Fare thee well, Fredo. We knew you all too well.

Featured Song: “Goodbye Stranger” by Supertramp

Sources:
“Embattled Attorney General Resigns” NY Times
“Attorney General Alberto Gonzales announces he has resigned” AP via Houston Chronicle

Previous entries:
“Dept. of Too Little, Too Late: Karl Rove avoids having his ass handed to him next year”
“Endgame Dept.:Scapegoat No. 2″
“That’s All She Wrote: Gonzo’s perjury problem”
“We prefer to think of it as a cock slap”

Does every administration spawn this many tell-all books? And do they usually share one title among all of them?

Sticking with what works

Also, did I mention that my copy of Katherine Harris’ book has a personal note written to me by the author?

Here we go with number two. Greg and Josh tackle the big issues: E. Coli, Moonbases, and even Rumsfeld himself. Warrior Cast: fresh for your ears with more music great music. Tune in to find out what cheese is featured on “This Week in Cheese.” We can’t wait. We mean, we can wait, but we won’t.

We’re too busy playing on the Internets to watch television, but we’ve read on the blogs that NBC is sort of down and out these days; scraping the bottom of the barrel, you might say. Even so, we were completely unprepared to read this in today’s Washington Post:

In January, NBC will replace football on Sundays with a reality series in which viewers pick the two leads for a Broadway revival of the musical “Grease,” hosted by President Bush’s cousin.

Wow. That may prove to be more stupid packed into a half hour of television than the American public can handle. We don’t mean to suggest that we know more about programming than the career experts over at the National Broadcasting Company, but that idea seems like, really fucking stupid.

Featured Music:

None. Grease is intolerable, even when it’s an ironic punk cover.