Dept. of Bad Education
Tag: It’s Out
A Colorado Springs elementary school recently announced a ban on a timeless playground pastime – tag. While not the first school in the country to ax the game, the addition of Discovery Canyon Campus Elementary is indicative of a growing trend: the sissification of America.
When asked about the ban, Assistant Principal Cindy Fesgen claimed that “it causes a lot of conflict on the playground” and an apparent increase in tattletailing:
“Well, I don’t want to be chased, but he won’t stop chasing me, or she won’t stop chasing me.”
The kids are still free to run as long as no one is running in front of them. While the notion of “tag, you’re IT!” is now only a very distant, painful memory for these fortunate elementary students, Discover Canyon is also spearheading a brave new educational model, mainly that:
Because life is fair. And let’s none of us waste our time trying to solve the actual problems surrounding our mediocre-at-best public education system.
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